Highs and Lows of July

The Lone Ranger

   I think I'm getting tired of Johnny Depp. Ever since he dropped out of the Whitey Bulger biopic for not being given his standard salary, it has been fully revealed that this guy has gravitated into the realm of actors, whom longer possess the craft and value of performing and just take on any crap just for a buck. Speaking of crap, The Lone Ranger was an effortless pile of garbage, that contained Disney's inability to abstain from they're immaturity of showing the Old West tragedies, such as Indian massacres. If this studio is going to constantly handle serious issues like these in the most innocuous ways, then they should just leave it all alone. I wish I could say that was the only problem with this movie but. So, when do sidekicks take the lead roles in films? When those sidekicks happen to be weird enough, to where, Johnny Depp can chew up the scenery and make that character even weirder, to the point where the protagonist is nothing more than just a side character. I would be simple to just ask why Johnny Depp didn't just take the role of The Lone Ranger, but an even simpler answer would be that The Lone Ranger isn't someone to goof off with, unlike Tonto, who Depp has no care for making a complete fool out of, along with the entire Native American culture. Absolute Garbage, plus why did I feel like I was watching Night at the Museum.

Pacific Rim

 Great, fun Blockbuster. Although, the Imax version was so underwhelming compared to Prometheus, the greatest looking movie ever in Imax. Other than Idris Elba and Ron Perlman, not really any standout performances. Don't know why didn't let Charlie Hunnam use his Australian accent. 

      RIPD

 

The Proposal, Safe House and The Croods. All three films received mixed to positive reviews, also all three were financially successful. Wolverine Origins and Green Lanterns. Both failures, critically. Both comic book films. Throw RIPD in that category, you got another failure. Message to Ryan Reynolds: hang up the tights and stay away from comic book movies. As a matter of fact, just stay away from bad movies all together. Reynolds is very similar to Jackie Chan. I remember seeing Rumble in the Bronx for the first time and just being blown away by this guy. I through my Bruce Lee collection to the side for space for Jackie, anticipating his next flick. Super Cop, wow. Rush Hour, great. Rush Hour 2, mmh good. Tuxedo, what the hell, man. It gets worse from then on. I first spotted Reynolds in Blade Trinity. Horrible movie, but Reynolds was flawless. Unlike Chan's gradual decline into disappointment, Ryan Reynolds just went head first and hasn't come up for air since. Yeah, Safe House was financially successful , but that movie sucks. Now, onto this, which isn't as terrible as you might think. However, the positives do not include Reynolds. Jeff Bridges along with Kevin Bacon steal the show, while Ryan's just dull. Some of the dialogue was very funny. Horrible visuals. Where did the 130 million dollar budget go? This movie's failure at even trying to be derivative to MIB just shows it's hopelessness. Wouldn't call this trash, but it's certainly is bad. Looking at Ryan Reynolds, I couldn't help but think this guy is a future soulless actor, playing in a traditional CBS sitcom with a laugh track playing behind him. Wake up, pal.

Red 2

 When I was going into this, I was hoping that they toned down all the old jokes, which they did. My feelings for Red 2 are about the same as the first installment, just a little better for this one. The chemistry between Bruce and John Malkovich really shine, bringing out the humor and great scenes. Lee Byung-hun and Neal McDonough are great additions to the movie, even though McDonough seems to playing like his Robert Quarles character from Justified, plus I think he wears the same suit as that character. Still, he plays a great villain. I wish I could say the same for the pointless Catherine Zeta Jones and Anthony Hopkins, who pays the price for trying to chew up scenery with such a pitifully written role. Who got him to sign up for this? Louise Parker and Helen Mirren were also great. Okay flick. Good to see Bruce Willis actually stayed awake during his performance, unlike A Good Day to Die Hard.                                                                                                                                                                                                                             The Conjuring

                                                                              

   Best movie of July. It's more than just a horror film. Whenever there's a World War Z, a Last Exorcism Part 2, or a ridiculous sequel to the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre that just pisses you off, James Wan will come out of nowhere and take you by surprise. This guy really deserves the title of 'Master of Horror'. Can't wait to see what he has in store for Fast and Furious 7.

                                                       Only God Forgives

                                                                               

   Good movie by Nicolas Winding Refn, but not his best film. His approach to Valhalla Rising, which is pretty similar as far as artsy style, had a much more stable direction in it's narrative, while Only God Forgives was all over the place. This movie felt like the director was trying so hard to detach himself from Drive that he made a convoluted movie that even confused him.

                                                               The Wolverine

                                                                               

As I write this review, my opinions towards it are constantly changing. Hugh Jackman is a good actor, but he does not make a good Wolverine, except for the first X-men, when he's jacking up Cyclops, and his claws don't look like crap. It's amazing how after the first X-men the Wolverine claws get worse and worse. Going back to Hugh Jackman; I'm just tired of this guy, but like I said he is good and he gave it all, unlike the rest of the cast, mainly the two female Asian roles. Usually it's the under developed characters that can bring a performance down, but in this case, where the two roles are well written, but Tao Okamoto and Rila Fukushima are horrible actresses, who aren't really actresses but plain ole models who've been in a couple of flicks. I don't care how vulnerable you make Wolverine, this guy vs. a bunch of Yakuza thugs is really weak. Well, at least they're not as dull  as these ninjas, aka. poor man's Foot Clan. Michael Dudikoff's American Ninja, Ninja Assassin ninjas. Where were these cool, mystical warriors. I would say that the action scenes were great, if the trailers didn't show a glimpse of every action scene and left the uninteresting stuff out. Okay. A lot better than X men Origins: Wolverine. As popular as the Wolverine character is, he's only as interesting as the characters around him, which is why X1 and X2 were so good. You distance this character and he goes nowhere.

Fruitvale Station

 

Very interesting case that makes you want to learn more about it. This film's deliverance of this case to me is really the only good thing I say about this movie, which through the 1st and 2nd Act are just going through the motions just to set up for the 3rd Act. The performances are good but nothing that requires a push for an oscar nom. Whenever someone's getting a phone call, a blue cell phone screen pops up on the screen, which makes it look like a cheap T Mobile commercial.  Decent movie, but very overrated.

The Journeys of June

The Purge

Watching the trailer and viral videos of this film, you would believe that this would be the most viciously violent you would ever see. However, The Purge, surprisingly, compared to most violent movies, is sort of quiet, which it does brilliantly by having the most heinous acts implied and not revealing graphics, making the movie feel like it's blood drenched with savageness. I appreciated how maturely this movie was handled, with showing how the more times this event is performed the crazier people get. Great movie.

 

  

Man of Steel

 

 

Best Film of June. Michael Shannon took the Zod character to more depth than the cartoony performance of Terence Stamp. Laurence Fishburne was great, but I'm not sure why he came off as a editor for TMZ, instead of looking the part of a well respected newspaper company. Lose the earring, dude. Amy Adams has nothing on Margot Kidder. Then again, I can't really blame Adams'.  It just seems like anything with Christopher Nolan or Zack Snyder has poorly written female characters: Rachel Dawes, Catwoman (primarily just ruined by Anne Hathaway without assistance), and every woman in Sucker Punch. Although, the Faora character, played by Antje Traue was amazing; a lot of the time, outshines Shannon's Zod. Didn't realize that was her from Pandorum.

 

World War Z  

 

   

 

World War B. B for Bullshit. Brad Pitt is one of the few A list actors who can take on roles with leaving out their celebrity appeal, but this movie is all Brad Pitt, the celebrity. I hate when people take a lucrative sub genre like zombies and just take advantage of it just to throw out some crap like this.  It was like they kept getting confused whether they were the undead version of zombies or the infected '28 days later' style zombies.There's a poster with Pitt's character with a automatic weapon strapped over his back. He never really used any weapons at all. He really didn't do anything but go from country to country and say 'I need answers. I need answers. My family. My wife.'. Nothing. I thought I was going in to see an insane, Troy version, zombie ass kicking Brad Pitt. Wait. Where's the gore in this. Oh, it's Pg-13. Now, to think of it, has there ever been a Pg13 zombie flick. This movie missed out on the most important part of zombie movies, the human element. People are evil, when facing chaotic times. Zombies aren't the monsters in zombie movies. It's the depths human nature goes to survive, cope. And will someone please show Marc Forster where the zoom out button on the camera is. He showed the same fault in Quantom of Solace. During the action scenes, he's just too up close on the actors. Awful, irritating piece of trash, but I do enjoy seeing James Badge Dale get more roles.

May in Review

Iron Man 3

 Disappointed by the first two Iron Man film's, I would never have thought of seeing a third film. Then I hear Shane Black signs on as director. That, along with a convincing trailer, I'm in. Iron Man 3 is the best Iron Man film, but it still suffers, greatly, from the same problems in the majority of summer films. Weak child actor, a pointless character, and out of nowhere anxiety attack shenanigans. I hate when child actors are given roles that you would never see a real child say or do, especially when that child actor isn't any good to begin with. Rebecca Hall was totally pointless. I understand if you wanted to make the events from Avengers feel like such an impact on Tony Stark's life, but tossing in some cheap anxiety attacks, which were displayed in more of a humorous way than dramatic, was a terrible choice for this character. Great Summer flick- Just an observation, one of the sets look as if they were taken right off of Uncharted. Also curious about if they used the Mandarin the way they did, including the casting of Ben Kingsley, was to not disrupt Chinese box office revenue.

                                                          The Great Gatsby

One word. Horrible. Great performances with mediocre visuals, so some style and no substance at all. Actually, I'm being to kind on the visuals. One of character's mansion looked very flat, like a cardboard cut out. Every time I tried giving the film a shot, Jay Z music kept bugging my ears. I guess it didn't me hearing modern day music in a period piece like Django Unchained because of the way Tarantino shot the film, but The Great Gatsby is definitely a filmed period piece. It completely takes you out of the movie.

Star Trek Into the Darkness

   Star Trek Into the Darkness reactions, bad or good, should be a wake up call for J.J. Abrams with his nature of secrecy becoming consequential to his entire story. Much like M. Night Shyamalan with his love of twists. Although, unlike twists, marketing films with secrecy can be damaging to your box office in take. I think if this movie had marketed who the real villain is, it would be doing way better. Benedict Cumbercatch was amazing. Chris Pine and Karl Urban both stepped up their performances from the last installment. Zachary Quinto was good but written more comically, something like Terminator, which Arnold did a better job of handling it and keeping the role serious, but it doesn't work well with Spock. Fun movie.

                                     Furious. Fast. Drift Fast...Whatever 

Ride of a Lifetime. It's amazing how these movies get better and better as they go along. Just one problem.Amnesia. Amnesia storylines  should be forbidden from all movies.

   Now You See Me

     Louis Leterrier, the master of defying gravity and the laws of physics with Transporter and Transporter 2, showed his true skills with Incredible Hulk. Then falls victim to mediocrity action films like Clash of the Titans. Now You See Me falls in between Hulk and Titans due to strange pacing and having story that's taken way too seriously, which was meant to make this movie seem very smart, which is the real magic trick. Pretty Good film, but suffers from not delivering mindbending filming of illusions, such as Trance does with it's hypnosis theme. Just a simple movie, interesting enough to get some enjoyment from.

APRIL IN REVIEW

EVIL Dead

I have never seen a film so gory. So bloody. So demonic. And be so uninteresting. This straight to dvd- like added to the lack of fun I wanted to experience so badly from this movie.

  Army of Darkness was my introduction into the Evil Dead franchise. I watched this movie about twenty times before realizing it had previous installments. Headed to the nearest blockbuster, I rented Evil Dead and enjoyed it, going on to watch Evil Dead 2 as well.

  When I first saw the trailer for the new Evil Dead, I felt no excitement or disappointment. Then I saw this garbage and wish I had been a little more disappointed enough not to see it. Throwing out lines and putting in certain scenes just because they were in the original were the biggest flaws of this movie. Actually it was the moments that weren't in the original at all that kept me from walking out. 

I was hoping for something like Prometheus, in the same universe as it's predecessors but not a sequel nor remake. Instead it's just another weak update of a great horror movie. Pure Trash.

42

Great Performances all around, even though Harrison Ford went a little too far with his grandpa acting performance. A few corny moments. Pretty Good Biopic.

Trance

  

After seeing Danny Boyle's annoying Slumdog Millionaire and putting up with a trapped and isolated James Franco for 127 Hours , I was beginning to think this director had nothing left, until Trance, an amazing film that looks into the theory of hypnosis which perfectly goes along with Boyle's choice of camera shots, taking you back to the cinematography from Trainspotting. Great movie.

Oblivion

 This movie has better visuals than it does with storytelling. The longest exposition I've ever heard. Once the story start, it turns out to be an okay film but nothing special.    

                                               The Place Beyond the Pines 

An unusually structured movie with a clear view of a 1st, 2nd, and 3rd act and all three acts being very different from the other, which was the major problem with this movie. Act 1 is the actual crime drama, which is the strongest point of the movie. Act 2 switches over to a completely out of the ballpark police corruption storyline that is so cliche, making this the worst portion of the movie. Then the final act is where the story picks back up, however it still does not match the great beginning. I would have like this better if they kept this same type of storytelling but just had better execution with the 2nd and 3rd act. Pretty Good Film that could have been a lot better and for a personal note, add more scenes with Rose Byrne.

                                                                  Pain & Gain

The Best Michael Bay movie since Bad Boys 2. And at his most conserved with small action scenes replaced by an actually well written character driven movie. Wahlberg, Rock and Mackie all do great jobs of bringing these real life criminals on the big screen. This movie is identified as a action comedy genre. But it's more of a drama then anything else. It's the foolish acts of these criminals which is so outrageous that you can do nothing but laugh at them. Best Movie of April even though Bay couldn't resist his usual antics such as female super models working out in a gym with full on makeup.

March in Review

My birthday month. Good month of movies.

                                            Oz The Great and Powerful

James Franco sucks. Over the top performances. Cheesy expressions. It was like he was still doing his hosting job at the Oscars. Compared to Franco, the rest of the cast were pretty decent. The creation of Oz was spectacular. I don't know if it was the fact that Sam Raimi directs or not, but this really feels reminiscent to Army of Darkness. Unlike the meaningful chemistry around Dorothy and her companions, Oz is surrounded by annoying, badly written sidekicks. DECENT FLICK BUT COULD HAVE BEEN BETTER IF ROBERT DOWNEY PLAYED OZ LIKE HE WAS SUPPOSE TO FROM THE START.

                                                         DEAD Man Down

Dead Man Down redefines the revenge, but not in a good way. This movie, although entertaining enough to bare, has the worst revenge story I've ever seen. If it wasn't for the cool opening of a gang of assassins led by Terence Howard, I don't think I would have stuck with film more than ten minutes. What's worse is that this movie doesn't just have one revenge story but two, and it's gets really dull, up until the money shot that involves a truck and house, which is the main reason for seeing this movie. After this movie, no one in film has any idea what to do with Colin Farrell. To be honest, after the one of the biggest bombs of last summer, Total Recall, which starred Farrell, I was really surprised to see this guy still getting work after his constant failures in the mainstream portion, especially when it comes to action films. He seems more fitting for the small screen. OKAY MOVIE, BUT FARRELL SHOULD QUIT WHILE HE'S BEHIND.

                                                         Olympus Has Fallen

Gerard Butler can kick some serious ass. Why isn't this guy a bigger action hero he should, instead of constantly trying to spread himself to romantic comedies, which are all terrible. 300, action, success. The Ugly Truth, rom-com garbage. Law Abiding Citizen,action, success. Playing for Keeps, rom-com, pure garbage. Can we stop with these action movies that try to relive the 90's with the pointless girlfriend component. Radha Mitchell plays Butler's wife, who's a nurse at a hospital only to have some connection to the plot. Why couldn't you just make a staff member of the President. Speaking of pointless, Ashley Judd plays the First Lady. Those enormously, goofy looking cheeks on the face of Judd was more appealing than her performance. Earlier, I would have thought this film would be the biggest misrepresentation of the Secret Service, but after recent current events, I find the absolute desolation of the Secret Service to be somewhat fitting. I didn't like the use of Aaron Eckhart, either the wrong role or just the wrong movie for him. And a couple of times I confused him for a secret service agent. ALONG WITH THE LOVE AFFAIRS OF CGI AND THE CONSTANT USE OF THE AMERICAN FLAG VERY FUN AND ENTERTAINING FLICK.

                                                                GI Joe 2

BEST OF THE MONTH OF MARCH. THE ROCK RULES. Now that I got that out of the way, Bruce Willis has done shit before, Hudson Hawk for example, but the more I think about the last Die Hard and it's ridiculousness of it's plot and title, the more I feel like I'm getting tired of ole' Bruce. Man, that's hard to admit. He just did that movie with such carelessness that it was a distraction for me to see him in this, especially being the person with thee worst written lines in this feature. If Red 2 fails, I don't know where to go from here.

FEBRUARY IN REVIEW

Welcome back, Walter Hill. It's great to see that he hasn't lost his cool, gritty style to action films. And much like Hill's work, Bullet to the Head suffers from a weak plot. Pretty Good Action flick.

Worst Die Hard since Die Hard 2. What were they thinking with slapped together work of garbage. It wasn't hard to tell this installment was just thrown together, with the February release, smaller budget, and being way shorter than all previous Die Hard flicks. The chemistry between Bruce and Jai existed but this movie was so fast moving with it's pointless action scenes, that it was over before they really had a chance to really show off the father and son relationship. So they tarnish this relationship with the typical father, admitting how he's never there for his son, and his son listening from a distance and all of a sudden they're the perfect team. So, they went from John Jr. pointing a gun at his own father, showing that these two had a really violent filled falling out, to being immediately family again without any real conversation going on. TRASH.

Typical haunted house movie, but instead of ghost and demons, it's aliens. About aliens. Are they or were they ever really scary? Maybe if I knew what they would do once your abducted. That whole probing theory is weak. This movie seemed like it was going into a new direction of alien conspiracies. Instead, it's just a that tries to build scares by  making wait and wait until near the end for the big payoff, which is worse. TRASH, FOR HAVING FOOLISH CHARACTERS MORE CONCERNED ABOUT FINANCES THAN A ALIEN INVASION.

He cries, he protects his family, he kicks ass. Best movie of February.

Trailers Trash

When I first got into movies, my main attractions was just going to see teasers and trailers. Watching a countdown clock go down to zero and Pierce Brosnan popping on screen announcing himself as James Bond for the Goldeneye teaser trailer, my cheeks raising so high that they touch my eyeballs and my face red as a strawberry with enjoyment. Most times I would just want to see a movie just because of the trailers of the future movies coming out. Now, it seems like those days are over.

   Movie Trailers, today, are nothing more than a mega commercial trying to sell you multiple products. You rarely hear original trailer music in previews. I've heard Kanye West's Power in so many trailers. I'm sick of Jay Z soundtracks. The worst is when the music isn't even a decent match for the trailer, such as the Clash of the Titans trailer using The Bird and the Worm. When I watch a sword and sandal genre flick, rock music doesn't come into mind. It's like the marketing team is selling the music of these artist more than the movie itself. Also, can we stop with these clips in almost every action movie trailer where someones jumping off a roof and time slows while they're in mid air, which was most likely made famous by The Bourne Ultimatum.

   I guess it could be worse. Like with the 70's, when you were shown full scenes that went on for almost 10 minutes, such as in the Halloween trailer, where almost a full chase scene was shown. The trailer for Godfather used flash clips, and some were spoilers. However, they did have complete focus on what they were trying to sell. A lot of trailers today just go all over the place and many of them follow the same dull ass formula. Please just focus and sell your movie and not music from popular artist or throwing in clips that are not meant for trailer view.