The Not So Scary October

Machete Kills 

Although not a horror movie, with Machete Kills' stylized B-movie feel, it's the closest I've gotten to this month. Unlike Once Upon a Time in Mexico, where Rodriguez's vast amount of characters completely engulfs the El Mariachi character, no matter how many characters he puts in Machete Kills, the main character is never left in the dust. The guest stars in these roles also deserve some credit for really taking their characters out there. The first Machete saw De Niro and Steven Seagal still trying to ham it up with the same old 'tough guy' act; Mel Gibson's goes nuts along with Demian Bichir. Also it's less preachy and 3rd grade-like messages about immigration issues than the last Machete, I was able to enjoy Machete Kills for all it's wackiness, which is my main reason for watching a movie like this. More Enjoyable than the first installment, however, maybe it's just now I'm starting to notice but Rodriguez has really shown his loss for creativeness in some degree, watching his repetitive antics.

Captain Phillips

 

If not a genre in itself, the 'Based on True Story' plot tags can sometimes be overwhelming by giving out  information about an event taken place, or sometimes the films are embellished to keep audience interest. It's rare to see a film that's based on a true story to give you the whole story, while at the same time giving you small notes so that you'll be drawn to finding out about the actual story yourself. Primarily due to Paul Greengrass' need to do whatever it takes not to bore his audience, Captain Phillips becomes a really good thriller, along with it's suspenseful pacing, engaging score, interesting perspectives from each character.

Escape Plan

This should have been Arnold's comeback movie. He's not the actual lead guy. More humbling role than a sheriff. Give this the release date of the Last Stand back in January. It would have been perfect for Arnold and maybe the box office revenue for this movie as well. Escape Plan has a feel of the small area of decent 90's action flicks, with it's low level action sequences, cheesy score, and like most 90's action flick, the overdoing of every possible thing you can do. With my lackluster feel towards 90's movies, which take up the least amount of space in my movie collection, if these two icons where in the majority of them, I probably would have a different opinion. I loved the concept of the Federal Bureau of Prisons employing escape artists to test the reliability of certain prisons, which was better than what I was expecting, just a prison inmate trying to bust out of a maximum security prison. Very good movie. Would have been even better if 50 Cent was left out of this movie. Someone please stop these music artist from being movies. 50 Cent plays a computer tech expert named Hush. I'll bet 100 bucks he came up with that ridiculous name himself. He shows no kind of computer skills throughout this entire movie; being a hard role to play begin with,looking like your trying to hack into a system, this is a absolute insult to Chloe O'Brien and Luther Stickwell. And out of nowhere he turns into this secret assassin who hides in the back of cars and tells people 'time to go to sleep', while not actually killing them. 

The Counselor

Like many people, after No Country for Old Men,  I anxiously go to see anything with Cormac McCarthy's name attached to it. The Counselor, McCarthy's screenplay debut, reveals: how McCarthy can create an this exotic looking movie through words, Ridley Scott's high regard for McCarthy's talent, and unfortunately revealing him as a obvious beginner of writing screenplays and being able to discern it from writing a novel, and acquiring an amazing cast.  Like most of the film industry, even though actors and actresses are the most heavily paid, their talents are not fully given the duly respect they deserve. Yeah, this movie was for the most part all McCarthy but I doubt this movie would have had such an impact on me if Michael Fassbender was replaced with Channing Tatum, Javier Bardem replaced by Hayden Christensen, and Cameron Diaz replaced by guess who? 50 Cent.

September Voyage

Riddick

 Vin Diesel has one the most interesting acting careers ever known. Here's a guy who was supposedly fill the shoes of the departing Schwarzenegger. Proving to audience that he can handle macho action flicks, with Pitch Black and The Fast and the Furious. Also, showing how well rounded he can be with a animated film, The Iron Giant. Then somewhere in between, a few wheels came off that wagon of his. I personally blame Babylon A.D. I know there's The Pacifier, but everyone can do a movie like that and make up for it. Babylon A. D. was his one his core genre and he failed, miserably. So, like everyone else, who believed they're careers were going to take off after the first Fast and Furious installment, but soon, discovering how awful they're careers were getting, Diesel returns to popular franchise. Now, back on top again, even though Dwayne Johnson has perfectly settled into the Schwarzenegger chair, while improving his acting ability along the way, Vin is still capable of setting his own stone, which he has done with bringing back one of the coolest characters in a sci fi movie. I've never seen Pitch Black and I hated Chronicles of Riddick, but now, with his revitalization, I had to check out Riddick and was really blown away. I love low-key sci-fi films that are more concerned about entertaining the audience with cool characters and action and just some over the top CG heavy, celebrity driven, dull looking garbage. Yeah, Gravity, I'm looking right at you. I enjoyed how it wasn't just all Riddick. Every actor had a chance to show off their character, like Katee Sackhoff, who's amazing. I even enjoyed Batista, although the face off between him and Riddick was a letdown. Cool Movie-but next time leave out the CG dog. That was terrible. It's okay when you bring in an actual dog and kill it off, because it does bring in a emotional reaction for audience. But why would I care about something that isn't real and on top of that just as hideous as can be.

 Insidious Chapter 2

Insidious:Chapter 2 is to Insidious as 1981's Halloween 2 is to 1978's Halloween. Doesn't top it's original, but at the same time just as good, which is very rare for horror films. Like Halloween's switch from horror suspense style to Halloween 2's slasher horror style, the Insidious franchise takes the same interesting step with switching from creepy, supernatural horror to more of a possession type horror film. Another thing that makes Insidious:Chapter 2 a great sequel is that it doesn't restart the story and use the same elements; it's more of an addition, which makes Chapter 2 a perfect subtitle.

Prisoners

Whatever happens throughout the last few months of this year. I will never forget 2013: the year I discovered just how weak an actor Hugh Jackman is. Mostly playing Wolverine throughout most of his career, it was really hard to find where Jackman lands as an actor. When I first saw the trailer to Prisoners, I knew that I will finally find out what this guy is really about. And did I ever. If there's any good I have to say about Jackman's performance is that it goes along the lines of my feelings towards this movie. Terrible. Jackman is playing this bible quoting, master hunting, super zombie apocalyptic survivalist, with his safety basement. Yeah, I know, how can a guy like this lose a child. Not to say that they way the children in this film were taken were reasons of complete negligence, but with a guy like this, it was a little strange. Also, I never saw where these traits were necessary for this character, even as he was torturing Paul Dano's character. Terrence Howard and Viola Davis were so inconspicuous I didn't see the point of them, as far as the casting of these two high quality actors goes. It was like they tried so hard to star stud this movie, because the script is nothing less but a thrown away episode of an police procedural tv show. Prisoners is decent during the first and second act, but the final moments is where this movie just completely comes apart. It tries so hard to be this grim tale and holds back momentum in every scene. On a good note, Jake Gyllenhaal was the only good thing about this movie. 

Playful August

2 Guns

Not since Lethal Weapon have I seen such a great combination of two actors. Unlike Bullet to the Head's uncomfortable chemistry between Stallone and Kang, 2 Guns puts the 'buddy' in buddy cop films. There's a lot of great comedic moments in this movie, as a consequence, vandalizes the action along with the rest of the plot. The makers of this must've been so gung-ho about getting Washington and Wahlberg on board that they ignored any sense of writing. Typical action scenes, good lines, funny-Okay movie. Somebody tell Paula Patton to stop trying so hard; it blows a awful performances.

Elysium

 Niel Blomkamp is becoming a true master of Sci-Fi. Cool visuals.Fantastic futuristic technology. Great performances across the board. With that said, this movie has a lot of issues, whether good or bad or some I just don't know. 1.Why is every single villain in this movie an ultimate jackass? Jodie Foster's scheming against someone that's scheming against her. All these guys need is an evil Bond villain haircut. 2. You really get no sort of perspective from the citizens of Elysium. There's just glimpses of them throughout film. 3. Now, this film having brought in issues of immigration, either this was Niel Blomkamp's way of showing how weak the borders are or something just ignored, but Elysium is the weakest space station in the history of Sci-fi flicks. No defenses against incoming aircraft. Intruders crash landing in to be cured then sent back to Earth after they got what they needed. Large amount of security personnel are machines, which seem to be easily programmable. Unless you have a man down on Earth, shooting missiles, your scot-free. I guess it could be worse, like the Death Star. 

 There's a lot of criticism about Niel Blomkamp's ability as a writer. I really don't see any justification in this. He seems more interested in directing then coming up with a A++ script. I can't think of any James Cameron movie where I can solemnly say, "this is profound writing". Still entertaining at the same time. 

 Kick Ass 2

 Great movie. John Leguizamo was a surprise. Too bad he stick around longer, which is more than I can say for Jim Carrey's over acting. Big letdown from Nic Cage to this guy. I love how this potential trilogy is turning into it's own thing. Even though it is another comic book movie, it feels really fresh.

  

Highs and Lows of July

The Lone Ranger

   I think I'm getting tired of Johnny Depp. Ever since he dropped out of the Whitey Bulger biopic for not being given his standard salary, it has been fully revealed that this guy has gravitated into the realm of actors, whom longer possess the craft and value of performing and just take on any crap just for a buck. Speaking of crap, The Lone Ranger was an effortless pile of garbage, that contained Disney's inability to abstain from they're immaturity of showing the Old West tragedies, such as Indian massacres. If this studio is going to constantly handle serious issues like these in the most innocuous ways, then they should just leave it all alone. I wish I could say that was the only problem with this movie but. So, when do sidekicks take the lead roles in films? When those sidekicks happen to be weird enough, to where, Johnny Depp can chew up the scenery and make that character even weirder, to the point where the protagonist is nothing more than just a side character. I would be simple to just ask why Johnny Depp didn't just take the role of The Lone Ranger, but an even simpler answer would be that The Lone Ranger isn't someone to goof off with, unlike Tonto, who Depp has no care for making a complete fool out of, along with the entire Native American culture. Absolute Garbage, plus why did I feel like I was watching Night at the Museum.

Pacific Rim

 Great, fun Blockbuster. Although, the Imax version was so underwhelming compared to Prometheus, the greatest looking movie ever in Imax. Other than Idris Elba and Ron Perlman, not really any standout performances. Don't know why didn't let Charlie Hunnam use his Australian accent. 

      RIPD

 

The Proposal, Safe House and The Croods. All three films received mixed to positive reviews, also all three were financially successful. Wolverine Origins and Green Lanterns. Both failures, critically. Both comic book films. Throw RIPD in that category, you got another failure. Message to Ryan Reynolds: hang up the tights and stay away from comic book movies. As a matter of fact, just stay away from bad movies all together. Reynolds is very similar to Jackie Chan. I remember seeing Rumble in the Bronx for the first time and just being blown away by this guy. I through my Bruce Lee collection to the side for space for Jackie, anticipating his next flick. Super Cop, wow. Rush Hour, great. Rush Hour 2, mmh good. Tuxedo, what the hell, man. It gets worse from then on. I first spotted Reynolds in Blade Trinity. Horrible movie, but Reynolds was flawless. Unlike Chan's gradual decline into disappointment, Ryan Reynolds just went head first and hasn't come up for air since. Yeah, Safe House was financially successful , but that movie sucks. Now, onto this, which isn't as terrible as you might think. However, the positives do not include Reynolds. Jeff Bridges along with Kevin Bacon steal the show, while Ryan's just dull. Some of the dialogue was very funny. Horrible visuals. Where did the 130 million dollar budget go? This movie's failure at even trying to be derivative to MIB just shows it's hopelessness. Wouldn't call this trash, but it's certainly is bad. Looking at Ryan Reynolds, I couldn't help but think this guy is a future soulless actor, playing in a traditional CBS sitcom with a laugh track playing behind him. Wake up, pal.

Red 2

 When I was going into this, I was hoping that they toned down all the old jokes, which they did. My feelings for Red 2 are about the same as the first installment, just a little better for this one. The chemistry between Bruce and John Malkovich really shine, bringing out the humor and great scenes. Lee Byung-hun and Neal McDonough are great additions to the movie, even though McDonough seems to playing like his Robert Quarles character from Justified, plus I think he wears the same suit as that character. Still, he plays a great villain. I wish I could say the same for the pointless Catherine Zeta Jones and Anthony Hopkins, who pays the price for trying to chew up scenery with such a pitifully written role. Who got him to sign up for this? Louise Parker and Helen Mirren were also great. Okay flick. Good to see Bruce Willis actually stayed awake during his performance, unlike A Good Day to Die Hard.                                                                                                                                                                                                                             The Conjuring

                                                                              

   Best movie of July. It's more than just a horror film. Whenever there's a World War Z, a Last Exorcism Part 2, or a ridiculous sequel to the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre that just pisses you off, James Wan will come out of nowhere and take you by surprise. This guy really deserves the title of 'Master of Horror'. Can't wait to see what he has in store for Fast and Furious 7.

                                                       Only God Forgives

                                                                               

   Good movie by Nicolas Winding Refn, but not his best film. His approach to Valhalla Rising, which is pretty similar as far as artsy style, had a much more stable direction in it's narrative, while Only God Forgives was all over the place. This movie felt like the director was trying so hard to detach himself from Drive that he made a convoluted movie that even confused him.

                                                               The Wolverine

                                                                               

As I write this review, my opinions towards it are constantly changing. Hugh Jackman is a good actor, but he does not make a good Wolverine, except for the first X-men, when he's jacking up Cyclops, and his claws don't look like crap. It's amazing how after the first X-men the Wolverine claws get worse and worse. Going back to Hugh Jackman; I'm just tired of this guy, but like I said he is good and he gave it all, unlike the rest of the cast, mainly the two female Asian roles. Usually it's the under developed characters that can bring a performance down, but in this case, where the two roles are well written, but Tao Okamoto and Rila Fukushima are horrible actresses, who aren't really actresses but plain ole models who've been in a couple of flicks. I don't care how vulnerable you make Wolverine, this guy vs. a bunch of Yakuza thugs is really weak. Well, at least they're not as dull  as these ninjas, aka. poor man's Foot Clan. Michael Dudikoff's American Ninja, Ninja Assassin ninjas. Where were these cool, mystical warriors. I would say that the action scenes were great, if the trailers didn't show a glimpse of every action scene and left the uninteresting stuff out. Okay. A lot better than X men Origins: Wolverine. As popular as the Wolverine character is, he's only as interesting as the characters around him, which is why X1 and X2 were so good. You distance this character and he goes nowhere.

Fruitvale Station

 

Very interesting case that makes you want to learn more about it. This film's deliverance of this case to me is really the only good thing I say about this movie, which through the 1st and 2nd Act are just going through the motions just to set up for the 3rd Act. The performances are good but nothing that requires a push for an oscar nom. Whenever someone's getting a phone call, a blue cell phone screen pops up on the screen, which makes it look like a cheap T Mobile commercial.  Decent movie, but very overrated.

The Journeys of June

The Purge

Watching the trailer and viral videos of this film, you would believe that this would be the most viciously violent you would ever see. However, The Purge, surprisingly, compared to most violent movies, is sort of quiet, which it does brilliantly by having the most heinous acts implied and not revealing graphics, making the movie feel like it's blood drenched with savageness. I appreciated how maturely this movie was handled, with showing how the more times this event is performed the crazier people get. Great movie.

 

  

Man of Steel

 

 

Best Film of June. Michael Shannon took the Zod character to more depth than the cartoony performance of Terence Stamp. Laurence Fishburne was great, but I'm not sure why he came off as a editor for TMZ, instead of looking the part of a well respected newspaper company. Lose the earring, dude. Amy Adams has nothing on Margot Kidder. Then again, I can't really blame Adams'.  It just seems like anything with Christopher Nolan or Zack Snyder has poorly written female characters: Rachel Dawes, Catwoman (primarily just ruined by Anne Hathaway without assistance), and every woman in Sucker Punch. Although, the Faora character, played by Antje Traue was amazing; a lot of the time, outshines Shannon's Zod. Didn't realize that was her from Pandorum.

 

World War Z  

 

   

 

World War B. B for Bullshit. Brad Pitt is one of the few A list actors who can take on roles with leaving out their celebrity appeal, but this movie is all Brad Pitt, the celebrity. I hate when people take a lucrative sub genre like zombies and just take advantage of it just to throw out some crap like this.  It was like they kept getting confused whether they were the undead version of zombies or the infected '28 days later' style zombies.There's a poster with Pitt's character with a automatic weapon strapped over his back. He never really used any weapons at all. He really didn't do anything but go from country to country and say 'I need answers. I need answers. My family. My wife.'. Nothing. I thought I was going in to see an insane, Troy version, zombie ass kicking Brad Pitt. Wait. Where's the gore in this. Oh, it's Pg-13. Now, to think of it, has there ever been a Pg13 zombie flick. This movie missed out on the most important part of zombie movies, the human element. People are evil, when facing chaotic times. Zombies aren't the monsters in zombie movies. It's the depths human nature goes to survive, cope. And will someone please show Marc Forster where the zoom out button on the camera is. He showed the same fault in Quantom of Solace. During the action scenes, he's just too up close on the actors. Awful, irritating piece of trash, but I do enjoy seeing James Badge Dale get more roles.

May in Review

Iron Man 3

 Disappointed by the first two Iron Man film's, I would never have thought of seeing a third film. Then I hear Shane Black signs on as director. That, along with a convincing trailer, I'm in. Iron Man 3 is the best Iron Man film, but it still suffers, greatly, from the same problems in the majority of summer films. Weak child actor, a pointless character, and out of nowhere anxiety attack shenanigans. I hate when child actors are given roles that you would never see a real child say or do, especially when that child actor isn't any good to begin with. Rebecca Hall was totally pointless. I understand if you wanted to make the events from Avengers feel like such an impact on Tony Stark's life, but tossing in some cheap anxiety attacks, which were displayed in more of a humorous way than dramatic, was a terrible choice for this character. Great Summer flick- Just an observation, one of the sets look as if they were taken right off of Uncharted. Also curious about if they used the Mandarin the way they did, including the casting of Ben Kingsley, was to not disrupt Chinese box office revenue.

                                                          The Great Gatsby

One word. Horrible. Great performances with mediocre visuals, so some style and no substance at all. Actually, I'm being to kind on the visuals. One of character's mansion looked very flat, like a cardboard cut out. Every time I tried giving the film a shot, Jay Z music kept bugging my ears. I guess it didn't me hearing modern day music in a period piece like Django Unchained because of the way Tarantino shot the film, but The Great Gatsby is definitely a filmed period piece. It completely takes you out of the movie.

Star Trek Into the Darkness

   Star Trek Into the Darkness reactions, bad or good, should be a wake up call for J.J. Abrams with his nature of secrecy becoming consequential to his entire story. Much like M. Night Shyamalan with his love of twists. Although, unlike twists, marketing films with secrecy can be damaging to your box office in take. I think if this movie had marketed who the real villain is, it would be doing way better. Benedict Cumbercatch was amazing. Chris Pine and Karl Urban both stepped up their performances from the last installment. Zachary Quinto was good but written more comically, something like Terminator, which Arnold did a better job of handling it and keeping the role serious, but it doesn't work well with Spock. Fun movie.

                                     Furious. Fast. Drift Fast...Whatever 

Ride of a Lifetime. It's amazing how these movies get better and better as they go along. Just one problem.Amnesia. Amnesia storylines  should be forbidden from all movies.

   Now You See Me

     Louis Leterrier, the master of defying gravity and the laws of physics with Transporter and Transporter 2, showed his true skills with Incredible Hulk. Then falls victim to mediocrity action films like Clash of the Titans. Now You See Me falls in between Hulk and Titans due to strange pacing and having story that's taken way too seriously, which was meant to make this movie seem very smart, which is the real magic trick. Pretty Good film, but suffers from not delivering mindbending filming of illusions, such as Trance does with it's hypnosis theme. Just a simple movie, interesting enough to get some enjoyment from.

APRIL IN REVIEW

EVIL Dead

I have never seen a film so gory. So bloody. So demonic. And be so uninteresting. This straight to dvd- like added to the lack of fun I wanted to experience so badly from this movie.

  Army of Darkness was my introduction into the Evil Dead franchise. I watched this movie about twenty times before realizing it had previous installments. Headed to the nearest blockbuster, I rented Evil Dead and enjoyed it, going on to watch Evil Dead 2 as well.

  When I first saw the trailer for the new Evil Dead, I felt no excitement or disappointment. Then I saw this garbage and wish I had been a little more disappointed enough not to see it. Throwing out lines and putting in certain scenes just because they were in the original were the biggest flaws of this movie. Actually it was the moments that weren't in the original at all that kept me from walking out. 

I was hoping for something like Prometheus, in the same universe as it's predecessors but not a sequel nor remake. Instead it's just another weak update of a great horror movie. Pure Trash.

42

Great Performances all around, even though Harrison Ford went a little too far with his grandpa acting performance. A few corny moments. Pretty Good Biopic.

Trance

  

After seeing Danny Boyle's annoying Slumdog Millionaire and putting up with a trapped and isolated James Franco for 127 Hours , I was beginning to think this director had nothing left, until Trance, an amazing film that looks into the theory of hypnosis which perfectly goes along with Boyle's choice of camera shots, taking you back to the cinematography from Trainspotting. Great movie.

Oblivion

 This movie has better visuals than it does with storytelling. The longest exposition I've ever heard. Once the story start, it turns out to be an okay film but nothing special.    

                                               The Place Beyond the Pines 

An unusually structured movie with a clear view of a 1st, 2nd, and 3rd act and all three acts being very different from the other, which was the major problem with this movie. Act 1 is the actual crime drama, which is the strongest point of the movie. Act 2 switches over to a completely out of the ballpark police corruption storyline that is so cliche, making this the worst portion of the movie. Then the final act is where the story picks back up, however it still does not match the great beginning. I would have like this better if they kept this same type of storytelling but just had better execution with the 2nd and 3rd act. Pretty Good Film that could have been a lot better and for a personal note, add more scenes with Rose Byrne.

                                                                  Pain & Gain

The Best Michael Bay movie since Bad Boys 2. And at his most conserved with small action scenes replaced by an actually well written character driven movie. Wahlberg, Rock and Mackie all do great jobs of bringing these real life criminals on the big screen. This movie is identified as a action comedy genre. But it's more of a drama then anything else. It's the foolish acts of these criminals which is so outrageous that you can do nothing but laugh at them. Best Movie of April even though Bay couldn't resist his usual antics such as female super models working out in a gym with full on makeup.